Friday, August 20, 2010

Gladys Has Devilish Random Thoughts

I haven’t done this in a while but I thought I would join in the fun this week.  Mrs. GGGG yes as in 4G she is really fast like the new 4 G I-Pad.  
Photo courtesy of Social Media

What did you think I meant?  Mrs. G’s host Friday Fragments and honestly even though I’ve had 47 bazillion fragmented thoughts in just the last 30 seconds I have not had time to record them.  I thought I would take a break from my slaving away to join in a little fun.   So without any further ado here are some of my random and fragmented thoughts.  When you have read mine go on over to Mrs. G’s Half Past Kissing Time in 4-G and join the fun.
We were having a perfectly pleasant summer then someone turned on the damned furnace.  If it’s damned does that mean the furnace is in hell?  I digress, see another fragmented thought.  So someone on the east coast decided it wasn’t fair that we Californicans were having a wonderfully cool pleasant summer with cloudy mornings and 70 degree days.  That big old meany then called down to Hades and said “hey Beelzebub what’s up with those Left coasters?  Why are they the only ones not suffering the fire and brimstone effect?”  Well old Satan could not stand that someone was having a pleasant time of things and he threw some more sinners on the fire and blasted that heat right on up our way.  Just so you know it’s hotter than HELL here so tell Lucifer he can turn down the heat now.

I went shopping last week with my niece, Tooter.  We went antiquing.  I was standing next to a 50% off table and some yahoo tried to buy me.  I know I’m old but I didn’t know that I was old enough to be ½ priced at the antique store.
One of my very favoritist bloggers is Jody at Couture Allure.  She has some of the most beautiful vintage ensembles you will ever lust after.  Oh but that isn’t all.  Nope she is the master of fashion history and she is wonderful at giving us advice.  She is doing a series which is a virtual charm school.  Now I just love this because honestly couldn’t we all do with just a bit more refinement.  Heck I think even Miss Manners herself gets a refresher course now and then.  This week Jody is teaching us how to stand, last week it was how to walk. 
I have to tell you I have lost some of my charm what with all the flip flop wearing and informal causalities I have fallen into.  Then this week I was in attendance at a seminar.  I looked around in amazement at the manner of dress and deportment of supposedly educated business people.  Honestly I was appalled at the footwear choices as well as the too tight, too small and inappropriate attire.  Plus none of these women were told while wearing a dress please do not sit like you are in the gynecologist office getting your yearly exam.  Honestly NO ONE WANTS TO SEE THAT! 
Oh and one last word.  If you can smell your feet, so can everyone else.
This one comes from my daddy, Trooper Bob.  He said he was sitting in the little local deli the other day eating a sandwich because it was Doe’s hair-did day.  Anyway there he sat eating his lunch when he saw two women looking at him.  He said they would look at him the chat in hushed tones then look at him again.  Of course this made him a bit paranoid and he began thinking maybe he had forgotten to zip his fly or he had a booger the size of Pittsburg hanging out his nose.  So he did his geneflexation of his extremities “zipper up-check, nose clear-check, glasses hanging out of pocket –check, pen not leaking in other pocket-check” and found all was okay.  He continued to munch his chips and watch the two women from the top of his glasses when all of sudden they began their exit.  They, instead of heading for the door, came over to his table.  The large woman with the extremely big hair pointed her finger right at Trooper Bob and announced “You work at Wal*Mart don’t YOU?”  Trooper Bob did not hesitate, nay he did not falter he looked the woman right in the eye and said “Why Yes, yes I do.”  She clapped her hands together and replied “I KNEW IT!  You came to work just as I was let go.”  Trooper Bob agreed whole heartedly and said his goodbyes as the women walked away.  He just didn’t have the heart to tell them he has never worked at Wal*Mart.
I have been taking some wonderful classes lately and am learning so very much about why people are the way they are.  I recently was asked if I would attend a function with some one that I am very uncomfortable being around.  I thought long and hard about it and finally responded “Oh, I don’t think that would be wise.  You see I would probably say something to them they might regret.”  My friend sat there for a moment and then replied “what does that mean?”  I smiled and replied “I won’t regret saying it but they will certainly regret hearing it!”
Now as usual remember, Thoughts become things.  Think good ones.
I also want to share this little tid-bit with you.  Remember people aren’t your perception of them, they are their perception of them.


Doreen McGettigan said...

The Walmart thing still has me laughing..crazy ladies!
Have a positive and powerful week!

Couture Allure Vintage Fashion said...

Wait until you have to learn how to sit. It takes muscles, I tell you! And no flip-flops allowed in business seminars. I mean, if you can't wear them at the White House, you shouldn't wear them at work!