Showing posts with label Random Thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Random Thoughts. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 6, 2018

SEASONS

When I was a kid my favorite time of year was summer.  It stayed light until ten.  I loved the smell of newly mown grass and sneaking down to the creek with my siblings to fish, hang out or just explore.  The cicadas would sing their songs and we would gather their exoskeletons and attach them to our ears like rare jewels.  The nymphs would crawl from their holes in the ground, attach to a surface and emerge as an imagoe to sing their song and live their short lives looking for a mate.  I loved watching the sky, a bright blue accompanied by big cotton candy clouds billowing in the afternoons with the promise of a cooling shower.  Summer rains were the best.  The sky would darken and open up to pour a cool liquid on the steaming pavement and the thirsty lawns and fields.  It was a magical time of year, lazy days that seemed to go on forever.  We went on trips to the lake and swimming pools.  We made our own fun, invented games and made up our own stories.  We were free range kids. 

Houses would open up and young tanned bodies would explode into the street after bowls of sugary sweet cereal and glasses of Tang.  We would ride bikes, build forts and in the heat of the day hiding in and under big Mulberry trees napping and reading comic books.  Our knees were skinned and our faces dirty but we were content. 

Then came the early vestiges of fall.  Leaves dropped like tears on the tired brown lawns as the winds became crisper.  The rain came in the form of spitting cold razors cutting through sweaters.  The days were shorter and our time of being free range children came to an end.  We were cooped up in a classroom with the paste eaters and silent flatulence emitters.  Instead of foraging and exploring we were forced to sit by the window as the rain fell or the wind blew keeping its own company.  Walter Cronkite and Chet Huntly spoke of the protest taking place on faraway college campuses as the street lights illuminated the near-empty streets. 
The days started cool and crisp, frost shinning on the still green blades of grass.  We ran from our houses in sweaters with our Buster Browns laced up tight.  Our mothers packed lunches of bologna sandwiches and thermoses of Campbell's chicken noodle soup.  Room mothers invaded our classroom with ghost-shaped cookies and orange and black Halloween taffy and in an instant, we were making turkeys from the imprint of our hand and brown and yellow construction paper.  Then the time would crawl as we prepared for the annual Christmas program.  We learned our songs and routines while mothers sewed red and green felt outfits.  Our excitement palpable

            As an adult, I have come to appreciate those days when the leaves turn and the wind changes.   I love that the green begins to morph into yellow, orange and brown.  The crispness on the kiss of the wind is refreshing and the chill is an excuse to bundle up and wrap my hands around a warm mug.  I watch the squirrels desperately gather their acorns for their winter stash with fascination and feel the need to fill my own cupboard with hearty comfort foods. 
            The light fades earlier and once again I find myself sitting watching the rain fall on empty streets that glisten like diamonds.  It is the putting to bed of the summer, giving it a good rest so that in three short months it can once again rejuvenate and give birth to a new, brighter world and free-range children.


Thursday, March 24, 2016

The Ancients



I stand in the field of the ancients and read the names on the stones.  I stroll along reading births and deaths, remnants of who they were. Their families gathered around them to share the afterlife.  I hear the birds overhead and see the squirrels running, playing, working gathering the acorns from the wild oak trees and wonder what will be said of me.

 I pay homage to the ancients and leave my floral sacrifice to be ripped and torn, shredded by the wind.  I know the sun will bake the cloth and plastic; rain and snow will wilt their perky petals. Still I leave them.  It is what those who came before me, the ancients, did for their loved ones.  It is what I do.

I wonder if they look down from heaven and criticize my arrangement or chastise me for not visiting more often.  I wonder if they hear my words of remembrance or see my tears of grief.  I wonder if they are there at all.


I say a prayer to the ancients call upon their wisdom to help me get through my time here.  I feel a swelling in my heart and lump in my throat as a cardinal stares at me from the bare branch of a tree.   I know the ancients are here.  I know they are a part of every breath I draw.  They are with me.  They are me.

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

SLEEP ELUDES GLADYS

Gladys and Kahuna slept the sleep of parents.  A sleep in which every creak or groan, cough and hiccup awakens you from a sound sleep to jumping up looking for the boogeyman or at the very least the boogeyman’s throw up.    Gladys jumped and looked at the extra large numbers on the clock.  The green glow read 2:22.  She settled back on the pillow and closed her eyes tight trying to will herself back into the land of slumber.   Kahuna rolled over patted her arm and began his ascent into dreamland.

The warm wash of sleep swept over the couple and the night became still and quiet.  Then through the silence came that sound that makes mother’s ears perk and fathers duck under the covers.  It was the sound of horking.  If you are a parent or a pet owner, you know the sound of which I speak.  The sound that breaks through the night causing you to leap from the bed in which you share with said child or pet, switching in on lights and grabbing towels.  You begin the search for the pile of puke in a futile effort to clean it up before it soaks into the mattress. 

All of a sudden you are a ninja warrior, flipping and leaping wiping as you go.  Your partner snatches the offending creature from mid-hork and carries them gingerly but quickly to place where they can safely retch their guts without offending your sleeping place.  In mere minutes you have managed to completely undress the bed and redress it with clean linens as you carefully wad the wretched fouled sheets into a ball keeping the effluent away from you, the bed and the floor.  Then as deftly as you cleared the bed you are washing the foulness down the drain. 

Your partner is not sitting to the side sleepy eyed and waiting.  Nay they are dealing with the poor child, four legged or two, who has now managed to expel three days’ worth of intake onto the bathroom floor.  Your partner has their own choreography of dancing around the pile of vomit gathering paper towels while still holding on to the patient and wiping up with their feet.  They chasse’, pirouette and pliĆ©’ while wiping the face and patting the back of the sufferer.

Finally all is clean and all is calm.  They settle back into clean sheets still cool from the early morning.  The invalid between them on a towel with a bucket close by.  You look at the clock and it now reads 2:28.  You have performed the vomit ballet in six minutes.  You wait for your heart to stop racing and you take deep breaths.  You realize at 2:46 that you are waiting in anticipation for the initial horking sound and sleep will not return.

It is in those moments that you realize that you will not be sleeping and you reach to check the poor offending soul who has sprung you from slumber and they let out a long low snore. 

  

Monday, June 1, 2015

GLADYS IS LOST


Gladys crammed the last of the groceries in the cramped refrigerator.  “Do you smell that?”   She asked Kahuna.


“Smells like dead fish and broccoli” he answered as they both squeezed their heads into the semi-cooled space. 
 
They took all the groceries out and wiped down every inch of the box.  They sniffed every piece of food and cleaned the outside of all the containers.

“What do you think that smell is?”  Kahuna asked as he started replacing food into the tepid cooler. 

“I think something died in here.” Gladys answered.   “This thing isn’t even cooling, in fact I think the freezer done froze up and it has completely shut down.” 

Gladys did all she could to keep the smell down.  She scrubbed and cleaned.  She put bowls of baking soda in the crisper drawer that would barely open.  Who bought a refrigerator with the door that opened into the cabinets instead of away from them?  She put freezer packs in the refrigerator trying to keep the temperature cool but not turn the cooler down any further.  The little freezer was so iced over that the door barely opened.  Obviously it was time for a new refrigerator. 

Gladys went on line and shopped and shopped for a fridge that would fit the odd space in the little kitchen.  Success!  And it could be there in only three weeks!  Three weeks was nothing right?  You stand that smell for three weeks, maybe.
 

The day finally arrived.  Gladys sat anxiously waiting for the call giving her a smaller window than between 7:30 a.m. and 7:30 p.m.    Gladys sat thinking about errant meteors and how up here in the hills she was closer to them when the trill of her cell shook her out of her reverie.  

“Gladys speaking” she answered
“Iz sis Gladees Mackinculty?” said the faceless voice
“Close enough” she replied.
“Ve are close but ze GPS does not show vhere ju leeve.  I need divections”
“OK,  first of all vhere, I mean where are you?”
“Ve are on Lional Cunyin.”
“Go up to the third light and turn on Hippie Hills, then follow the yellow airplane hieroglyphics.  There will be one at each intersection.  When you get to Hill Street make sure you turn around in the first side street and back the rest of the way up the street.  Oh and be careful of the woman who lives in the white house with the blue door.  She has a baseball bat and a foul temper.”
“Jes, Ok, but vhat are hiramglycolics?”
“They are little drawings on the curb.  Just look for the yellow airplane and go in the direction they are pointing.”
“Jes, Ok, I vill call you vhen I near”
“You might want to have someone guide you up the street too.”
“Jes, Ok, I vill call."


She waited, and waited, and made a cup of coffee and waited some more.  She emptied the old refrigerator out.  She watched an episode of Lost, and wondered if the delivery men were stranded on a deserted island with “the others”.   Her phone buzzed.


“This is Gladys”
“Jes, dis is Vladimir.  I deliver refridgadair to ju?”
“Not yet.”
“I stink ve took wrong turn.  Ve are in Glendale?  Dis is close jes?”
“No, is not close, is far.”
“Jes, I pick up Chuey.  He been der afore.  He knows de vay.”
“Ok.  Tell Chuey to follow the yellow airplanes.”
“Jes, he says jello airplane ees good.”
“Ve vill be zere in twenty minutes? Jes?”
“Only if you know a shortcut.”
“Jes, Chuey know.”

Gladys washed the dishes, vacuumed the floors and watched another episode of Lost.  That was it!  She had the answer now.  Chuey and Vladimir only existed in another dimension.  They were not real or maybe she was dreaming all of this.

 
She pressed play on yet another episode of Lost, because why not binge watch while you wait.  Something caught her eye.  In the window of her front door something was popping up.  It was a head.  It was a man’s head. 

Gladys opened the door and there stood Vladimir, sweat soaked and springing up and down on his toes trying to see in the door.

“May I help you?”  She asked
“I am Vladamir.  I have your refrigerdair.  I come in, no?”
“Sure come on in.  Did you find the place ok?”
“Jes, Chuey, he know vay.  He say turn avound, he say back up.  It vas, how you say, difficulty.  Ze road she turns, ze truck, not so much.”
“Glad you made it.  The old refrigerator goes out on the porch and the new one goes here,” she said pointing to the odd space in the cabinets.
“Jes, ve vill bring now.”

He sprinted up the stairs like nobody should if they don’t want to die of a heart attack.  Gladys walked out on the porch to see how they were going to get a refrigerator down the sketchy staircase. 
A large man with the refrigerator strapped to his back came first with Vladimir and who Gladys could only assume was Chuey bringing up the rear.  They guided the large man as he stepped one step at a time carrying it like a papoose.  They made it to the landing but got hung up on a plant.  The large man struggled and tugged trying to get loose from the tentacles of the vine.  He pulled hard to the right then jerked to the left with his oversized pack pushing him forward.  He stumbled down several steps, caught himself and righted his burden.  Vladamir and Chuey grabbed blindly to help steady both the man and the cargo.  Vladamir caught his foot on the next step and fell forward onto the back of the large man.  Chuey reached out to catch Vladamir but missed.  The large man, icebox and Vladamir tumbled down to the next landing.

The large man steadied himself against the railing but Vladamir was victim to inertia and tumbled the rest of the way down.  He jumped up, dusted off his knees and announced “Ve are here.”
Gladys, biting back giggles, replied “Yes and what a grand entrance you have made.”
“Jes, yust  wyke de Cirque Soliel, No?”


The big man muscled the unit into the small apartment and set it in place.  He smiled at Gladys and set to work deftly taking the wrapping from the appliance and setting up shelves.  He took a package from his pocket, pulled out a cloth and wiped everything down.  He then turned to the old unit, wrapped his arms around it and walked it out the front door.   The large man opened the door on the old unit and took two steps back. 

“What is that smell?”  He growled.
“We don’t know.  It was like that when we moved in.  I think something died in there.”
“No ma’am it’s too small to get a whole body into, maybe one cut in half.” Replied the giant.
“I’m not even going to ask how you know that.” She replied with a forced smile.
“Yes ma’am prolly best you don’t know.”

The three men said their goodbyes and made their way back up the stairs as Gladys stood wondering, was it all really a dream?  Perhaps it was heaven or hell or perhaps we are all just LOST.  Well either way at least now her food will stay cold.





Thursday, May 21, 2015

GLADYS BORROWS TIME



Tap…tap..tap… Is this thing on?  Anybody there?  (crickets)

I know it’s been a long time since I’ve been here but I’ve been in a coma and then I had amnesia when I came to Stefano DiMera had kidnapped me… oh wait maybe that was Days of Our Lives.  In reality I’ve been here and then I went there and after that well I went over there and now I’m here. 

Most important I realized I really missed this creative outlet and decided it was time to return to writing this blog whether there was anyone out there still following or not.    I may not be here every day but I will be here more often than every 4 years. 

One of the many things that have happened to me in my journey is I’ve come to the realization that no matter where you go there you are.  Life takes us down so many paths and we must learn to enjoy each and every road we are traveling in the moment.  It doesn’t come easy for me to practice being in the moment as I am one who worries about things that may never happen.  I worry that I worry too much and then worry because I’m worried about that.  Such is the life of a constant worrier.

I have been working on not worrying so much.  Nurse Meme used to tell me not to go borrowing trouble.  I would thinK “why would I borrow trouble?  I might borrow sugar or shoes or even a really cute purse but trouble?”  I realize now what she was telling me not to fret over things that have not and may never happen.

A little over a year ago we moved to Hollywood South to work on a project.  The old Gladys would have obsessed over where we were going to live, what we were going to do and how it would all come together.  The new Gladys just loaded up the beast and settled in next to her sweetheart and was thankful to be along for the ride.  We finished that project and headed back to Californica.  Again the old Gladys would have gnashed her teeth and wrung her hands fraught with worry but the new Gladys once again thanked the stars above for the chance of another adventure.  


Now we are on yet another adventure, one that I hope will lead us to yet another adventure,


 but I’m not here to borrow trouble, I am just here for the ride.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Gladys Has Western Union Man Thoughts

Here it is Friday again. Can you believe it? I mean it seems like it was just Sunday and Donald Trump was telling Mark What-his-name that he was fired and telling crazy Gary Busey that he needed to straighten up. REALLY Donald? Busey straighten up? He is crazier than Bugs Bunny on crack. Did you not watch Celebrity REHAB?


Mrs. 4's over at Half Past Kissing Time Hosts Friday Fragments.  Go on over and check out the wandering wonderings of her crew, but only after you have read mine. 


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I am so excited to tell you all that I will be making a trip to the South Pacific soon as I just got notified of a huge windfall. See below.



From: Western Union® Money Transfer [mailto:melgamal@eri.sci.eg]


Sent: Friday, April 15, 2011 12:16 PM


To: undisclosed-recipients:


Subject:


Please be informed that you have $250,000.00 Lodged in our Western Union outlet to be transferred to you as a Compensation. Contact Western Union Office.


Mr. Richard Quest.


Aren’t I just the luckiest girl in the world?  I mean I actually have $250,000 LODGED in their Western Union Outlet. 
What exactly is it lodged between?  What outlet would that be, an electrical outlet?

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On another note do you think that Mr. Richard Quest might be kin to my old flame Johnny Quest? And Bandit?

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This correspondence brings me to another point on which I ponder. Do you remember in the old black and white movies the Western Union person would come to your house and deliver a cablegram? Do they bring you money with a money transfer? But more importantly do they wear the hat?

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As you know it is Easter time which means only one thing. Yes Cadbury eggs. You see when Jesus died on the cross and they put him in the tomb then a Giant Chicken in Bunny Ears placed the egg in front of the tomb. Therefore we celebrate by eating a giant Cadbury Egg.


What do you mean that's not how the story goes?

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3


Now tell me truly do you remember when you didn’t dare go to church on Easter Sunday unless your shoes matched your purse and your hat and gloves were white? Oh and shopping for that Easter dress was an event? Or if you are of the male persuasion you got a new tie?



Oh so you’re old too?

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Okay that is it for this week. I’m off to enjoy the beautiful spring sunshine and wait for the Western Union Man to deliver my big wad of cash.

Oh and I know I'm a week early for Easter but who says I won't have more next week?

Now go on and be good to one another and remember thoughts become things...think good ones.















Friday, March 18, 2011

Gladys has Random Things That Make You Ask Why Thoughts

It has been awhile since I’ve done this but the way things have been going I felt it had to be done. I have questions, burning questions. I know they make a salve for that but I want answers. I want others to lament with me. I want to kvetch and moan and beleaguer points that need to be beaten to the point past where the horse has expired. I want to state the obvious to the point of revulsion. In other words I want to just be me.
So go on over to Mrs. 4 at Half Past Kissing Time and join in on the Friday Fragments but not before you read mine.


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Why don’t tomatoes taste like tomatoes any more? I remember when I was a kid and eating a tomato was almost as good as eating candy. Now they just taste like paper.


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Why is it when you finally pay off the vehicle you paid way too much for in the first place and now must keep even though it gets 2 miles to the gallon in the second place, it starts to break. Oh and it is never things like a wire comes loose or a new air filter. The things that break are the master cylinder that is absolutely necessary for the car to continue to run and not die at stoplights. Or it is the fuel pump that is located inside your gas tank and they can’t just reach their hand in there and unscrew it and put a new one in. OH NO! They must empty the fuel tank and remove it completely off your car, even though you have just put in 30 gallons of $5.25/ gallon fuel. FOR THE LOVE OF GAWD WHY?


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Why is it that I always have to stand in line behind someone who is tall enough that my nose hits about their waist?

Why is that when I stand in line behind above mentioned person, they have eaten broccoli, beans and eggs and they feel it necessary to release the resulting methane gas right at my nose level?

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Why is it that whatever ride you want to ride at the Amusement Park is exactly the same ride everyone else in the world wants to ride?


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Why is it when you are young the rides at amusements parks always seem so big and scarey, but when you go back as an adult they are just another version of rush hour on the 405 freeway and whole lot less exciting.

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Now go on and be good to one another and remember thoughts become things, think good ones.



Friday, November 19, 2010

Gladys Has Hell's Kitchen's Random Thoughts

It’s Friday and Fragments over at Mrs. 4’s Half Past Kissing time and I thought since it was the weekend before Thanksgiving I’d share some recipe’s with you. These are not just ANY recipe’s. They are from my dear departed mother’s, Nurse Meme, cache’ of recipes. When you finish cooking with me go on over to Mrs 4 and have a gander at the other Friday Fragmenters.


I feel I need to tell you she collected recipes from everyone and every where. I have a box that has scraps of paper with recipe’s written on the. Well sort of… What I mean is she would scribble down a few ingredients and then she would instantly know what it was when she saw it. Unfortunately I never learned her code.

I wanted to share some of these with you and then maybe we can decipher them. I will also try to decipher her or other’s handwriting and tell you what I think they are. Ready?

Yes that says:
Flour, beer, salt, tabasco beat and cover sit for 2 hours.  Now I'm not sure if you are supposed to sit for two hours after you have drank the beer thrown the salt over you shoulder, sipped the tabasco and then beat the flour or if you are supposed to mix these ingredients together and let them sit for 2 hours.  The big question what the hell was my mother making?
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The next one is:

That says:
8 oz of cream cheese
2 cups of powdered sugar
1 cup of whipped cream - whipped.
 
Now if it's whipped cream why are you whipping it again?  Was it extraordinarily bad?  Maybe she meant whip all of the ingredients together and then do what?  Sit and eat it out of the bowl?  Did she wish for me to get "the sugar diabeetus"?  I ask you WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?
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Time for a confession.  This MY handwriting from 5th grade.  I recognize it.  What in Sam Hill was I making? Oh and as you can see this nut didn't fall far from the tree Oh and what is marjine?  Is it something like margarine?  Do I let it sit in the frig or fridge?  Does it bake for 30 minutes or sit in the frig?  I am so confused!  I am amazed I was allowed any where near an oven!  .  
Alright move along nothing more to see here...
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This says 2 Eagle Brand Milk
6-120 cans Orange Crush
1 crushed Pinapple
Strawberry Shasta

Whoa there Nelly!  6-120 cans of ORANGE CRUSH?  I hope there is more than 1 bathroom in the place.  And do you peel the pinapple before you crush it?  I am sure this is a punch for a Baby or Wedding shower but honestly what good sourthern woman would make a punch without lime, orange or pinapple sherbert in it?  I just wouldn't be fittin.
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The next one was just too worn out to even try and scan so I will just have to share it with you by typing it.

2 Cans Eagle Brand Milk (yes we liked the canned milk in our house)
Pie Crust (this looks promising)
Sliced banana (okay, I'm still with ya)
Cool whip (I prefer real whipped cream but okay)
Boil 4 hours - put in pie crust cut banana over the top and finish with cool whip.

Wait if we boiled the cool whip for 4 hours along with the Eagle Brand Milk and the Pie crust and banana how are we going to separate out the banana, pie crust and cool whip after?  I'm confused. 

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And Finally:
1 C Eagle Brand (Yes my family single handedly kept the company going)
3 Egg Yolks
1/2 Cup lemon juice
Beat egg whites put 1 tablespoon sugar per eggwhites and brown in oven.  Use graham cracker crust in the pie pan.

Ok where did the egg whites come from and what do I do with the rest of the ingredients? 

Anyone want to come to my house for pie?
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Remember Thoughts become things so think good ones.





Friday, October 29, 2010

Gladys Has Recyled Random Thoughts

I haven’t done this in a while but I thought I would join in the fun this week. I have been really busy but always try to catch up with Mrs. G’s over at Half Past Kissing Time. Every week she does Friday Fragments where you can go and post things that aren’t long enough to be a full fledged blog post but you still want to share. I have lots and lots to share but I will try to be brief. Okay maybe not brief but I’ll try to keep it short. You have no idea how difficult that is for me to do. You see I am a detail person; which in my case, means I can’t tell a story unless I give every detail. I can’t just say “I went to the store”. I have to say “I went to the store over on 4th street; you know the one with the big pumpkins outside and the little flower shop on the corner? Oh and I took the long way over there and saw a clown driving a Hummer. …” you get the idea. See I already did it just trying to tell you about Friday Fragments and why I can’t keep it short. So without further adieu here are my fragments and please make sure to go over to Half Past Kissing Time and hook up with the other Friday Fragmenters.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The other day I got a call from my niece, Tooter. She said she had something for me. Well this is what she made me. Aren’t they gorgeous? Oh and they were delicious too.


SCREEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMM

I was at the Squal*Mart the other day and the lady checking me out was unusually surly. I know they are usually surly but she was even more surly than normal. She was griping and kvetching about the fact there were 56 bazillion people in line and only 4 check stands open. I looked around and asked “So you’re having a pretty bad day, uh?” She glared at me and replied “Yeah.” I leaned over to sign my credit authorization and said “maybe you should just quit. I mean you seem really unhappy. Maybe the best thing for you to do is just quit.” She sucked in air and then spit out “but I NEED this job.” I smiled and replied “then maybe you should just be happy you have a job and not kvetch about how bad it is.” Needless to say I don’t think I improved her mood.


BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
I love vintage clothing. I guess I have always worn vintage clothing except when I was a kid we didn’t call it that. We called it hand –me-downs.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

Last weekend there was an estate sale for a millionaire. She had recently passed away and her family was selling off her stuff. Now first of all let me tell you they started this sale on Thursday, I showed up on Saturday. The warehouse was stuffed full. I began looking through her accumulation of 80 years of books, napkins, letters, jewelry, clothes and shoes. This woman never threw a thing away. It was amazing. It was like looking through her windows and seeing her play out the movie of her life. It was deeply moving.

Then I found her shoes. Oh MY GAWD! The SHOES! There were hundreds of pairs of shoes. They were in plastic containers and covered 40 years of her life. Shoes that were specific to outfits. OH MY GAWD the OUTFITS! Everything was stylish and matched. I was in bliss. I wanted to throw the clothes and the shoes on the floor and just roll in them.


I heard a choir of angels sing and a bright light appeared above one particular pair of shoes. I slowly walked over and there on the shelf was a pair of 1960’s Salvadore Farragamo reptile skin pumps. My breath caught in my chest, everything else in the room went blurry as I reached out to touch the holy grail of shoes. Then from out of no where a hand reached out and snatched them from the shelf. I fell to my knees and screamed “NOOOOOO!!!!!! I wasn’t done petting them.” Then just as the little boy in the final scenes of the movie Shane I screamed out “Come BACKKK!” sniffle, sniffle “PLEASE COME BACK!!!!!”


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I went to a “Green” conference last week also. No it wasn’t a conference about Kermit The Frog, which brings me to question who gives their child the middle name of THE? I digress.

I think it’s interesting that architects and builders are touting things as “green” and sustainable when our grandparents called it being thrifty. I mean honestly when I was a kid I thought that we reused foil because we were thrifty who knew I was being green?

Oh and did you know transom windows are now considered green and living above where you work is green? I guess that proves the point everything old is new again.



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Now as usual remember, Thoughts become things. Think good ones.




I also want to share this little tid-bit with you. Remember people aren’t your perception of them; they are their perception of them.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Gladys Has Devilish Random Thoughts

I haven’t done this in a while but I thought I would join in the fun this week.  Mrs. GGGG yes as in 4G she is really fast like the new 4 G I-Pad.  
Photo courtesy of Social Media

What did you think I meant?  Mrs. G’s host Friday Fragments and honestly even though I’ve had 47 bazillion fragmented thoughts in just the last 30 seconds I have not had time to record them.  I thought I would take a break from my slaving away to join in a little fun.   So without any further ado here are some of my random and fragmented thoughts.  When you have read mine go on over to Mrs. G’s Half Past Kissing Time in 4-G and join the fun.
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We were having a perfectly pleasant summer then someone turned on the damned furnace.  If it’s damned does that mean the furnace is in hell?  I digress, see another fragmented thought.  So someone on the east coast decided it wasn’t fair that we Californicans were having a wonderfully cool pleasant summer with cloudy mornings and 70 degree days.  That big old meany then called down to Hades and said “hey Beelzebub what’s up with those Left coasters?  Why are they the only ones not suffering the fire and brimstone effect?”  Well old Satan could not stand that someone was having a pleasant time of things and he threw some more sinners on the fire and blasted that heat right on up our way.  Just so you know it’s hotter than HELL here so tell Lucifer he can turn down the heat now.


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I went shopping last week with my niece, Tooter.  We went antiquing.  I was standing next to a 50% off table and some yahoo tried to buy me.  I know I’m old but I didn’t know that I was old enough to be ½ priced at the antique store.
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One of my very favoritist bloggers is Jody at Couture Allure.  She has some of the most beautiful vintage ensembles you will ever lust after.  Oh but that isn’t all.  Nope she is the master of fashion history and she is wonderful at giving us advice.  She is doing a series which is a virtual charm school.  Now I just love this because honestly couldn’t we all do with just a bit more refinement.  Heck I think even Miss Manners herself gets a refresher course now and then.  This week Jody is teaching us how to stand, last week it was how to walk. 
I have to tell you I have lost some of my charm what with all the flip flop wearing and informal causalities I have fallen into.  Then this week I was in attendance at a seminar.  I looked around in amazement at the manner of dress and deportment of supposedly educated business people.  Honestly I was appalled at the footwear choices as well as the too tight, too small and inappropriate attire.  Plus none of these women were told while wearing a dress please do not sit like you are in the gynecologist office getting your yearly exam.  Honestly NO ONE WANTS TO SEE THAT! 
Oh and one last word.  If you can smell your feet, so can everyone else.
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This one comes from my daddy, Trooper Bob.  He said he was sitting in the little local deli the other day eating a sandwich because it was Doe’s hair-did day.  Anyway there he sat eating his lunch when he saw two women looking at him.  He said they would look at him the chat in hushed tones then look at him again.  Of course this made him a bit paranoid and he began thinking maybe he had forgotten to zip his fly or he had a booger the size of Pittsburg hanging out his nose.  So he did his geneflexation of his extremities “zipper up-check, nose clear-check, glasses hanging out of pocket –check, pen not leaking in other pocket-check” and found all was okay.  He continued to munch his chips and watch the two women from the top of his glasses when all of sudden they began their exit.  They, instead of heading for the door, came over to his table.  The large woman with the extremely big hair pointed her finger right at Trooper Bob and announced “You work at Wal*Mart don’t YOU?”  Trooper Bob did not hesitate, nay he did not falter he looked the woman right in the eye and said “Why Yes, yes I do.”  She clapped her hands together and replied “I KNEW IT!  You came to work just as I was let go.”  Trooper Bob agreed whole heartedly and said his goodbyes as the women walked away.  He just didn’t have the heart to tell them he has never worked at Wal*Mart.
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I have been taking some wonderful classes lately and am learning so very much about why people are the way they are.  I recently was asked if I would attend a function with some one that I am very uncomfortable being around.  I thought long and hard about it and finally responded “Oh, I don’t think that would be wise.  You see I would probably say something to them they might regret.”  My friend sat there for a moment and then replied “what does that mean?”  I smiled and replied “I won’t regret saying it but they will certainly regret hearing it!”
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Now as usual remember, Thoughts become things.  Think good ones.
I also want to share this little tid-bit with you.  Remember people aren’t your perception of them, they are their perception of them.




Friday, July 2, 2010

Gladys has Painted Random Thoughts

It is Friday again and time for Mrs. 4444 to present her Friday Fragments. Go on go over read her fragments, link yours and have a big old fragmented party. Then go on over to Ann Again and Again for your weekly Virtual Girls Night Out. Have a drink, even if it’s just water, read some stories and partake in her game. Also link your Friday to her Friday.
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I have spent a lot of time in Home Depot this lately. I am now best friends with Mr. Imixpaintatthehomedepot. He has coached me through the perils of painting over unknown paint with a primer and helped me pick out spray paint for my projects. Thanks Mr. IMPATHD oh and thanks for getting me back a couple of hundred on the paint by telling me about the refund program.

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I have been spending a lot of time on several home decorating type blogs. Centsational Girl you rock as well as some others. You know what bothers me about some of them though? They don’t show you their stuff they just cut and paste from a bazillion home decorating magazines. If I wanted to see Traditional Home I would buy the magazine. I want to see how YOU incorporated their ideas with yours. One of my new favorites is Junkrestore. I love that girl and all her re-make-overs of furniture I would have left sitting on the side of the road. Go on over and look at what they’ve done. IN-CRED-I-BLE!
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So by now you’ve guessed I’ve been working on a few projects around the amazing technocolor house. I grew up in a house where spray paint was a staple just like flour, sugar and toilet paper. Not that we used the spraypaint for toilet paper or that we spraypainted toilet paper. Well not on a regular basis anyway. I digress. So I told Kahuna I wanted to paint this little cabinet. He looked at me and said “with spraypaint?” What did he expect me to paint it with finger paints? It just never dawned on me that other people didn’t use spray paint to color their world.


I forgot to take a 'before' picture so here is kind of what it looked like only not that nice and the after picture.  Yes I did it with Krylon because nothin says love like Krylon.


Before Pot

After Pot

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I went to a seminar last weekend and guess what? Once again I got seated behind this guy. If I would have had a can of spray paint I would have spray painted his turbon gold.

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Did you know you can shop Goodwill on line?  Yep it's shopgoodwill.com.  Now I wonder if you can get them to come pick up your stuff on line? 
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Which leads me to another question.  Why do I donate stuff to Goodwill and then go and buy more stuff from Goodwill?  Why is everyone elses stuff so much more appealing than mine? 
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Here are some things that make me happy.

Trooper Bob telling stories

Being able to say I knew him when...
Travis is now playing for Boston's farm team

Matilda and Missy

Seeing my little nephew all growed up and haired over.

Need I say more?
Happy 4th!

Now go on and be good to one another and remember thoughts become things, think good ones.