Sunday, November 30, 2008

I'm Pooped

As Madeline Kahn sings in Blazing Saddles.
I'm tired, Tired of playing the game. Ain't it a crying shameI'm so tired,
Gosh, Darnit I'm exhausted!

Why am I so tired. Well, let’s recap the last three days, keeping in mind that I am a major slack ass and as a usual rule I do absolutely nothing but loll about and drool like a bulldog staring through a butcher shop window. First I got up early Friday morning and was forced to get beautified enough to be seen in public. This means make-up, taming the wild mane that is my hair with a blow dryer a ton of product and a curling iron to straighten it. Yeah, I don’t get that either, I straighten my frizzy hair with a curling iron isn’t that against the laws of nature or something? Kahuna and I got to the airport where we are given our annual hernia exam and mammograms respectively. We then board a small vessel full of 40 people that I am sure to have the black plague or something nearly as bad from the sound of their coughs. Next, we fly in the complete opposite direction of our intended destination deplane and then sit for 4 hours in another airport so that we can again board a different vessel that contains 100 people with a whole new epidemic inducing disease to fly back the other direction. We arrive at our destination late Friday evening and drive another hour and a half to home. Since traveling is always exciting and our adrenaline is high we stay up and chat with our daughter into the wee hours of Saturday morning. Sleep finally overtakes us but not for long.
We rise early Saturday morning approximately 3 hours after the Sandman had finally loaded our lids. Kahuna along with our Techman and Nature Boy (I’ll explain later) drive another hour to move some furniture for Kahuna’s parents. Falulah and I go grocery shopping. We did our big box store shopping and then head to the grocery for the little items. We complete this task sometime before noon and take a break for lunch. Then the fun started. I spent all Saturday afternoon until late in the evening cooking, baking, cutting, chopping, mixing, seasoning, rubbing and sautéing. I made two casseroles prepared a barbeque rub and then applied it to 4 racks of ribs, two trip tips, and one chicken. I also made three pounds each of candied walnuts, almonds, and pecans as well as a huge green salad, a grapefruit salad and dough for rolls. Kahuna and the boys returned about the time I finished building my cheese tray. Again we stayed up chatting until late Saturday night.
This morning I was up before the roosters, heck I was up before the coyotes. I got the coffee ground and brewed, the potatoes peeled and boiled and the rolls started rising and made a blueberry cobbler. Then it was time to start cooking everything I prepared yesterday. We were having a family lunch. Yes, I did all this for my family and I loved every single minute of it.
It always amazes me how we can spend so much time in preparation, presentation, and planning and it all be annihilated within minutes. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining. I love that my family loves my cooking and it gives me a sense of accomplishment. I guess I’m just saying that is a lot of work for a slack ass. I just hope I don’t get my slack ass license revoked.
Now that the weekend has come to a close I will go back to working on my Ph.D. in slack ass and loll on the bed with the television remote in my hand and wallow until I get bed sores.

Oh and if you have never seen Blazing Saddles I just have one question for you. What cave have you been hiding in? I love Mel Brooks. I totally get his humor and would love to see more of his work. So go rent Blazing Saddles, Young Frankenstein, Space Balls and every other movie ever touched by Mr. Brooks and wallow on your bed, you’ve earned it.
Go on…I’ll be right here waiting. I’ll leave the light on for you.


Anonymous said...

Hello Beeutiful,

I'm so glad you're home! I hope betwixt your bakin, cookin, rubbin, hollerin, snake charmin and slack assin that you'll have a few for a face to face visit. I had a dream we got together and your hair was brown. I miss you!

Your Lonely Hairdresser :)

Anonymous said...

Spoken by "the Shewiff" as he weeds the letter witten by Madeline Kahn, "Deaw Shewiff. Meet me in my dwessing woom aftew the show." Later, the famous line, "It's twoo. It's twoo!" One of my favorite movies, too. And Airplane? Don't get me started. Roger, Roger? Ham on 5. Hold the Mayo. What's your vector, Victor? A hospital? What is it? It's a big building with lots of sick people in it, but that's not important right now. And stop calling me Shirley!