Why did a golf course have gasoline? I thought those cute little cars were electric.
Hey Trooper Bob “No MOSS!” (sorry inside joke)
Well that is one way to get a ride. A ride in an ambulance.
Ok I have a short little story here for you. I have a friend I’ll call Julie. Julie’s cure for these types of callers is to just open the door naked as a jay bird. One of two things happens they either NEVER come back or you get a whole lot more company.
Is this like calling the cops because someone stole your weed?
1:33 p.m. Someone in Evergreen had questions about a “peacock problem.”
Just tell them to stop watching NBC.
Well he couldn’t swing it by its ears so…
6:49 p.m. A resident of Poplar Drive approached his neighbor’s home, yelled at his neighbor’s children and then left.
I have heard about yelling at kids on your own lawn but on other peoples?
Well that was nice of him.
Nothing like a drunken fight.
Did she pick it up by its ears?
Is this like an SBD? He who smelt it dealt it?
Um I would have proved elusive had I seen a large python hanging from a tree.
I don't like snakes like this
I prefer my snakes to look like this.
Was he holding the camera coaching the pooch by saying “work the camera baby” or “that’s it give me more snout.”
Johnny Cash is back.
So would this be the start of a new group instead of Smash Mouth and Match Box 20 it could be Smash Box?
Well that’s pretty Shitty.
3:52 a.m. Authorities arrived at a local home to serve a warrant for the resident’s arrest. The individual then proceeded to hop in his vehicle, a red pickup truck, and flee the scene. While authorities pursued him for approximately ten miles, he eventually evaded arrest and is now at the center of a massive search.
I see an episode of Cops Flathead County on the horizon. Bad boy, Bad Boy, what cha gonna do?
Was it the color green or was it a Prius? Maybe the battery died.
Well that isn’t very neighborly
Yeah I know that I’m always concerned about those killer squirrels.
Maybe it was an alien and he gave him an anal probe through his eye.
Evidently Billy Joe McAllister missed the 3rd of June.
7:48 p.m. Someone on Flathead Drive called to report that a neighbor was living with 25 dogs in a 23’ RV. Authorities arrived to find the head count accurate and will be taking the dogs into custody.
What about the owner? Won’t he be lonely?
Guess she didn’t make the mistake the second time and hit her target.
That is pretty bad when a bunch of drunks don’t want another drunk to drink with.
You might want to check your warrants before you call the cops.
Maybe God spoke to them.
This one could be on stupid criminal tricks.
1:45 p.m. Someone in Marion is frustrated because their neighbors continually place rocks in the road.
4:04 p.m. A porch on Rhodes Draw was host to a small injured black bear.
Well it was nice of the owners to invite him.
Is this “THE DOCTORS” on TV? You know the ones who tell you everyone passes gas? Then proceeds to demonstrate it? Or is it the old Soap Opera “The Doctors”?
8:05 p.m. Someone in Marion consumed 10 to 25 unknown pills along with alcohol and subsequently lost consciousness. The individual was taken into medical care.
Did “The Doctors” prescribe them? Was it Michael Jackson?
It was Bigfoot.
Maybe it was Alan Funt. Smile your on Candid Camera (for those of you who are too young to know who and what this is it was the original Punked)
3:40 p.m. Somebody walked by and threw a rock through the window of a Whitefish home.
It was Bigfoot.