Saturday, February 7, 2009

Gladys has Random Thoughts

Gladys has Random thoughts and Random Pictures

1. I just finished watching the movie The Queen. In that movie everywhere where she goes she carries a handbag. What do you think the Queen carries around in that pocketbook? A coin purse just in case she wishes to buy a diet Coke? Tampons? Maybe she keeps pictures of her Corgies in there and she pulls them out at state meetings and says “Oh my, have you ever seen my puppies?” She’s the Queen for Cripes sake. I mean can’t she just snap her fingers or wiggle her nose or something and get whatever she wants?

2. Why do people respond to something you tell them with “Is that so?”. Yes it’s so, if it wasn’t so, I wouldn’t have told it to you. Do you want me to respond “No it’s not so.” It is what it is. Why do you ask if it’s so? So what? So true? So much? So little?

3. Why does your hot water heater go out when you are on vacation? Or just arriving home from a vacation where you have just spent your entire budget. Or when you are preparing to leave for the airport to catch your around the world cruise you have planned for your entire working life?

4. Why is it when you have a new born they wait until you have on your good clothes to throw-up on you? Do they know you have on your best cashmere sweater that cost $2000 to have dry cleaned at the special non-chemical environmentally safe cleaners?

5. How do dogs know you are getting ready to go to church, or a wedding or a special occasion? They must know because that is when they rush up to you with their muddy paws and nose from digging gophers to give you goodbye kisses all over your cream colored designer outfit. Do you think they say to one another “hey look she’s got on her cream colored Christian Dior Satin Sheath Dress it would look so much better with a big brownish red paw mark right on the left breast.

6. Why is it you can never find anything good to eat in a full pantry but when the larder is empty you know exactly what you want?


Queenie said...

Why is it I believe I am moderately entertaining until I read your blog? Kudos, my dearest, you've got me wondering about everything now - especially why is it that there is a four alarm fire in the middle of the night before your big party so you are cranky and exhausted and look like you should be in detox by the time you welcome your guests?

P.S. THIS queen has in her purse: a press pass, wallet, three good pens, an official Reporters Notebook, two cell phones, business cards, lip balm and my camera. I also have a tote bag in the backseat with toilet paper, warm socks, doggie poo bags, a shovel, a spare pair of old boots, warm scarves, mittens and extra gloves, granola bars, bottles of water, paper towels, wet wipes, more notepads, plastic cups and an umbrella. Clearly I'm ready for anything, as all good queens should be.

Girly Stuff said...

The pantry one is so stinking true!

Why is it that water leaks only happen when you are away from the house?

terri said...

You're so right about "is that so?" My husband always asks, "Really?" after I tell him something and I usually do make a smart-*ss remark back at him. DUH. Yes, really.

The Texas Woman said...

I'm bad about saying, "You're kidding me."

I'll try to do better.

The queen's too old to carry Tampons. What the hell does she carry in the blasted thing?

The Texas Woman

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

Giggle, giggle, snort, snort:)

You are so right about the Queen! Actually, you are right about everything!

Toad said...

Doncha think the Queen has a pistol in that bag. One time too often someone is gonna lead off an interview with why don't you quit and let Chuck take over, and Q's gonna let him have it.

Just one option of many.

Also, the water heater waited for me this time. I turned off the water before we left. It waited for the propane man to die.

Mrs4444 said...

Great questions, and great pics, too. Why is it that Gladys wastes perfectly good fragments on SATURDAY when should could put them in a Friday Fragments post?! Off to find out what you posted Friday that was so daggone important!

Jaime said...

the queen stashes the crowned jewels in the purse. shhh-we're not supposed to know